Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy bullshit

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

How do military families balance personal political views with respect for civilian leadership?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Do narcissists love their children?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

How does one succeed in life?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Can ringing in the ears be a sign of spiritual awakening?

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Final Fantasy 16 runs at 720p on Xbox Series X in performance mode - Video Games Chronicle

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

What is your review of The Office (U.S. TV series)?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I actually pay taxes

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

What do people aim for when they meditate, and how do they do it properly?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for fakery

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

What is the meanest thing your husband has said to you?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Famous 'ice-age puppies' are not actually dogs, according to new study - Earth.com

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I can count

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Health officials warn of measles case from traveler at Dulles Airport - The Washington Post

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I see through liars

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I can read

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand how hurricane paths work